My class teacher always said, "Be careful of what you pray for, because you do not know which of your prayers will be answered by God". I would go a little further with that, you never know in which form your prayer will be answered by God.
Raunak was a 6 year old kid who used to travel in my school-cab (auto). He was in pre-school; I being a 4th grader was always expected to walk him to his pre-school. To tell the fact, I hated this job. Even though it didn't cost me anything and his pre-school being just a small detour on my way to school, I hated dropping him off and picking him from his pre-school. I don't blame myself for being just a normal 4th grader hating any sort of responsibility, but what it ended up in, remains etched in my mind and many times makes me cry.
Raunak absolutely loved me. I was like the elder brother he never had, he used to keep chattering all the way from home to school and on the way back. He even kept mentioning about me to his parents and I was like "super hero" to him. I was not basking in the glory, for I knew this would only mean that I would become the designated person to accompany him to his pre-school. His parents even met me on couple of occasions thanking me for taking care of him like a younger brother. It was not long before I started hating Raunak. I was made to do a task I never wanted in first place and then made to look a "super hero" for that same task. Damn.. my luck. To make matters worse this little guy started imitating me, my style etc.. it felt like I was walking around with a miniature mirror image of myself. God, just take him away from me...
It was Christmas time and holiday season was about to begin. We had began preparing for the carols to be sung on Christmas and would have special prayer sessions every week. It was during this time that prospective students applied for admissions for the following year. Raunak coaxed his parents into applying for admissions at my school. He happily broke the news to me the follwing day.. saying.. "Bhaiyya (elder brother), now we will be in same school". Damn.... why are children so irritating. The following week, prayer sessions included a special prayer to the Lord from me; praying that "Raunak does not join my school.. There are many schools in the neighbourhood and all are great, so he wont be losing on anything by not joining my school but I would be gaining so much by him not joining."
Turns out.. he got the admission and his parents didn't even try for another school looking at his enthusiasm to join this school. I was shattered to say the least. I blamed God for letting me down; for not hearing my prayers. The rest of the school term was over and soon I forgot all about Raunak and was enjoying my holidays. As 01st of June (beginning of term) arrived, my heart sank. I had to bear my nemesis all the more; but I did not meet Raunak on first day of school or on the days to follow.. I was so glad that I didn't even bother finding out why he was missing.
One month down the line I heard from my Mom about Raunak, his parents visited my place to tell me about him. Not finding me at home, they had a chat with my Mom. On 31st May (day before the term began) Raunak had died. He had slipped and fallen into hot boiling water kept in container while there was a party at his house. His parents took the pain to locate my house to meet me and tell me this news as they knew I was the person closest to him. Apparently he was so happy all the vacation going gaga over the fact that he would be going to school with Bhaiyya (me). He spent 2 months of vacation buying books and stationary for school, his parents had never seen him so excited about anything before. Alas, he did not join my school. I cried like a baby that day.. even to this day his thought brings tears into my eyes.
Probably God answered my prayers, probably it was destined to happen. Whatever the reason be, I never forgave myself for hating Raunak. I never got an opportunity to apologise to him for having hated him all this while when all he did was loved me like a brother... and I never will. All he got for all his love for me was hate and he didn't deserve it. God loves us through various people and when we do not respect HIS love, he takes it away from us and leaves us to repent... all life..
We have to be thoughtful on what we pray for because we do not know in what way our prayer will be answered.
So long.....
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
hmmm - very sentimental but touching story. And considering that it really happened with you - its sad as well !! But as you said - "God has his ways of teaching us!! "
i almost cried :'(
is it true???
Post a Comment