When you are dining with the devil, make sure you have a long spoon. This idiom always fascinated me with its literal meaning and intended one. It basically meant that when you know you are in unfamiliar environment, make sure you are well covered for the risks involved. This is one lesson I would love my daughter to learn from me.
Dating rules are fascinating because there are no fixed rules, they are merely a set of guidelines to be followed if you don't have to cut a sorry face for yourself. No one better to teach these rules than your father and never listen to the inputs on these by your mother. I wish every father took some time out for his adolescent daughter and taught her these basic rules which would help her in her social life perpectually.
Date rapes are on the rise and if you study the pattern, in most cases, the victims are teenage girls and most of the agressors are boy-friends and his cronies. Let us forget about incest angle for a moment, because there is a bigger moral evil to be addressed in those cases. Date rapes can be avoided 100% of the times; all you have to do is look out for the classic signs and avoid walking into the traps. The problem is, that most dads dote their daughters so much that they dont accept that she is ready to date and be involved with a guy. It seems to them that their daughters are too small to do these things and in many cases, date rapes are a rude awakeing to such gullible fathers. Satuatory warning: Mothers cannot be good teachers in these cases because simply they cannot fathom the innovative brains of boys. They are more suited to take their loving sons to task and teaching them to respect women.
The problem arises with boys being starved for female affection and ends up with the rape of an unsuspecting girl; however the guilt of it charrs both of them forever. Let me state a few rules for you so that you can enjoy your dates and be safe at the same time. Avoiding a social life is not the solution and grounding yourself in your prime age is a total no-no. Enabling you to face the world is what we are aiming for.
Rule #1: Date a guy that you want to go out with, not the guy who asked you and you dont wanna let down. Believe me, in 90% of cases guys expect a NO. So its okay if they hear it from you.
Rule #2: A date is always about you, and keep it about you. Remember, just because he buys you dinner; you dont owe him anything. Your company is totally worth it, dats why he asked you in the first place.
Rule #3: Avoid alcohol at all times while on a date, it inhibits your rationale and getting a girl drunk is the easiest way for a guy. Dats you walking into a big trap.
Rule #4: Never trust a guy. Period. You may know him for years but always look out for classic signs of betrayal. Dont let it hit you hard by being totally trusting. Guys use anything as a fair game, so be aware of the "male rules".
Rule #5:At all times it is your responsibility to look out for your female friends and dont compete over guys. There are fewer women than men in this world, so all of you are assured of a mate : )
Rule #6: Never hangout with a boys gang where you are the lone female. Its okay to lookout for your safely and put in a polite but firm NO.
Rule #7: While on a date, you have to always look for yourself and do what pleases you at all times, trust me the guy is always looking out for himself. Its okay to be "the bitch" on a date rather than hear others call you his.
Rule #8: If a guy is too good to be true, there are 100% chances that he is bullshitting you. Never trust his words.
These are few general rules, and are meant to keep you safe. Always be on the lookout but dont be paranoid. I am not an expert at dating but I see it as a sport and as in all sports there are few rules to be followed to make it a enjoyable experience.
So long...
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Thursday, November 19, 2009
The Tiger bites a Lion..
Hello people... Bachi Karkaria had me in splits with this blog... I took the liberty to post it here for you guys and have transalted some bambaiyya language into Englist for your benefit.. Enzoy.. Hope she doesnt mind ;)
Bichare Balasaheb. How it is his fault? What he can he do if the name of the state is Maharashtra. Means, it is the maha- rashtra, no? Means, it has to be greater than the rashtra, no. Then why all the people are khali-pili ( unnecessarily) bom marta (shouting) over his attack on Tendulkar?
If you are called Maharashtra year in and year out, then the delusion of grandeur must get embedded in your DNA as surely as e coli in Mumbai's drinking water. It means you are above not just all other states, but above the Indian state itself. So naturally, Thackeray senior got his saffron silk dhoti in a twist over Sachin-baba's skewed notion of nationalism.
In his version of Tebbit's 'cricket loyalty test', Tendulkar put being Indian over being Maharashtrian, which the Supremo considers nothing short of high treason. So, he was perfectly entitled to launch a maha yuddh over it. Maharashtra must score over Mahabharat, no? What else could Krishna have done than give an 'affectionate warning' to the one-time Arjuna awardee?
Nakkich (Surely), Balasaheb is right. Of course, all cricketing glory is only about our Maharashtra. So where does India even enter the picture? Wadekar, Gavaskar, Vengsarkar, Tendulkar - the game is entirely our 'kar'mabhoomi.
Rubbing lasan chatni (Garlic pickle) into the chauvinistic wound, Sachin also foolishly stated that 'Mumbai belongs to the whole country'. So, he ekdum and fully-ch deserved the threat that Thackeray bowled at him in Saamna. Thank Chhatrapati Maharaj, that the misguided fellow at least had the sense not to say 'Bombay'. Then his batata vada (hey days) days would surely be numbered.
Nakkich, Balasaheb is right. Of course, Tendulkar must keep off the political pitch. But politicians must not keep off the cricket pitch. They must keep digging it up like the Shiv Sena men did at Ferozesha Kotla during the 1999 India- Pakistan test series and again in Agra in 2003, just before the Veterans Match with you-know-who.
Nakkich, Balasaheb is right. Of course, he had to warn Tendulkar 'not to lose on the political pitch what he has earned on the cricket pitch'. Who says Thackeray senior is already in danger of losing on this cricket pitch what he had earned on the political pitch? Or whatever is left of his legacy after his son has turned it into a gilli-danda game, and his nephew has run away with the danda. At one time, Indian cricket too had its Tiger, but Pataudi's pampered cub is not interested in being out for a duck; he prefers to go out with a Size Zero instead. No such self-indulgence for the heirs to the Sena lair.They must valiantly continue the mission of hacking down the rich biodiversity of the Mumbai forest and turn it into a monoculture which saps the soil and the sons thereof.
Well, like mortals, tigers too must age. Often they turn into man-eaters since they are too weak to take on prey worthy of their earlier prowess. But this time, our Tiger hasn't attacked a man, but a lionized boy. So wagh-saheb has bitten off more than he can now chew. It hasn't helped that he's still licking his wounds from the last election, where he was thrown to the wolves.
The latest attack is considered a slip even in the gulleys where the Supremo is still venerated. The Marathi manoos proudly consider Sachin to be one of their own, and the boy from Shivaji Park has always returned the compliment with grace and modesty. He is a steeped-in-the-varan local. So, sorry Balasaheb, to borrow from another game, this time you have scored an 'own goal'. Why, if aapla Tendlya was the type to swear oaths , you could safely bet that he'd do so in Marathi.
So long...
Bichare Balasaheb. How it is his fault? What he can he do if the name of the state is Maharashtra. Means, it is the maha- rashtra, no? Means, it has to be greater than the rashtra, no. Then why all the people are khali-pili ( unnecessarily) bom marta (shouting) over his attack on Tendulkar?
If you are called Maharashtra year in and year out, then the delusion of grandeur must get embedded in your DNA as surely as e coli in Mumbai's drinking water. It means you are above not just all other states, but above the Indian state itself. So naturally, Thackeray senior got his saffron silk dhoti in a twist over Sachin-baba's skewed notion of nationalism.
In his version of Tebbit's 'cricket loyalty test', Tendulkar put being Indian over being Maharashtrian, which the Supremo considers nothing short of high treason. So, he was perfectly entitled to launch a maha yuddh over it. Maharashtra must score over Mahabharat, no? What else could Krishna have done than give an 'affectionate warning' to the one-time Arjuna awardee?
Nakkich (Surely), Balasaheb is right. Of course, all cricketing glory is only about our Maharashtra. So where does India even enter the picture? Wadekar, Gavaskar, Vengsarkar, Tendulkar - the game is entirely our 'kar'mabhoomi.
Rubbing lasan chatni (Garlic pickle) into the chauvinistic wound, Sachin also foolishly stated that 'Mumbai belongs to the whole country'. So, he ekdum and fully-ch deserved the threat that Thackeray bowled at him in Saamna. Thank Chhatrapati Maharaj, that the misguided fellow at least had the sense not to say 'Bombay'. Then his batata vada (hey days) days would surely be numbered.
Nakkich, Balasaheb is right. Of course, Tendulkar must keep off the political pitch. But politicians must not keep off the cricket pitch. They must keep digging it up like the Shiv Sena men did at Ferozesha Kotla during the 1999 India- Pakistan test series and again in Agra in 2003, just before the Veterans Match with you-know-who.
Nakkich, Balasaheb is right. Of course, he had to warn Tendulkar 'not to lose on the political pitch what he has earned on the cricket pitch'. Who says Thackeray senior is already in danger of losing on this cricket pitch what he had earned on the political pitch? Or whatever is left of his legacy after his son has turned it into a gilli-danda game, and his nephew has run away with the danda. At one time, Indian cricket too had its Tiger, but Pataudi's pampered cub is not interested in being out for a duck; he prefers to go out with a Size Zero instead. No such self-indulgence for the heirs to the Sena lair.They must valiantly continue the mission of hacking down the rich biodiversity of the Mumbai forest and turn it into a monoculture which saps the soil and the sons thereof.
Well, like mortals, tigers too must age. Often they turn into man-eaters since they are too weak to take on prey worthy of their earlier prowess. But this time, our Tiger hasn't attacked a man, but a lionized boy. So wagh-saheb has bitten off more than he can now chew. It hasn't helped that he's still licking his wounds from the last election, where he was thrown to the wolves.
The latest attack is considered a slip even in the gulleys where the Supremo is still venerated. The Marathi manoos proudly consider Sachin to be one of their own, and the boy from Shivaji Park has always returned the compliment with grace and modesty. He is a steeped-in-the-varan local. So, sorry Balasaheb, to borrow from another game, this time you have scored an 'own goal'. Why, if aapla Tendlya was the type to swear oaths , you could safely bet that he'd do so in Marathi.
So long...
Thursday, November 12, 2009
Be proud to unearth the girl in you..
What picture comes into your mind when I say GIRL ... hold on guys, stop fantasizing.. I meant to ask, what qualities do you picture ? Love, compassion, empathy and all the related mushy qualities I bet. All of us have a girl inside us, thats right guys, you heard it absolutely right.. its up to us to unearth her and get her to the foreground. Don't go overboard and imagine a Bobby darling or a Rohit Verma, but try to get the point I am trying to make.
From the time we have realised the physical difference between girl and boy we have been told by our fathers not to play with girls. Even in the school, guys who play with girls are picked on by other "macho" guys and called names. Every time we feel vulnerable and emotional, we heard our friends jeer "Stop being a girl and get a pair". All this has led to a subconscious feeling that being a girl is bad. So much so, that girls have taken up being "a man" and are letting go of their feminine qualities to take on a "man's world". No one is realising that it is divine to be girl and a world without feminine qualities will be a dead, soul less world.
Let me clarify, I am not big on feminism and feminist movements because they do a lot of harm to womankind than to improve their condition, though I would confess to being fascinated and charmed by women. I often wonder what makes a woman take all kinds of hits (physical /emotional / financial) from her loved ones and still continue to love them. How often have we heard of a woman suffering domestic violence quietly and in hope that her husband / boyfriend will mend ways if she continues to love him. Being a man, I would not shake hands with any person who was abusive of me; but a woman not only stays under the same roof with him but also feeds him and "makes love" to him. Either she is dead inside or she has a heart as large as ocean to forgive all his mistakes. I would like to believe its the latter.
There are innumerable instances of women forgiving their husband who have strayed and taken them back, I can't really remember the last time I heard a man to this. But all this is changing and changing quite swiftly. Women are abandoning their feminine qualities and taking up qualities unique to men. I have heard now than ever before "If he can do it, so can I". All this is leading to a world with no love, compassion and empathy there is only cut throat competition. So ladies, don't mould yourself into men; just take some of the good qualities that men have and blend it with your best ones. Similar advice goes out to the guys, "there is a woman in each one of you.. just let her free".
Imagine a all man's world; every one means business, there is no place for emotions and each one is fighting with other in gathering incremental benefits. In contrast a all woman's world will be the one with love, compassion and empathy along with your normal inborn qualities. We need a woman's world now more than ever. The next time you see an emotional scene in a play, feel free to cry; next time you meet your loved ones, tell them you love them and what they mean to you; next time you see someone in pain try to empathise with them. Its not a sign of weakness to show some emotions and if someone calls you a GIRL... feel proud about it.
So long....
PS: Excerpts and instances taken from "Vagina Monologues".
From the time we have realised the physical difference between girl and boy we have been told by our fathers not to play with girls. Even in the school, guys who play with girls are picked on by other "macho" guys and called names. Every time we feel vulnerable and emotional, we heard our friends jeer "Stop being a girl and get a pair". All this has led to a subconscious feeling that being a girl is bad. So much so, that girls have taken up being "a man" and are letting go of their feminine qualities to take on a "man's world". No one is realising that it is divine to be girl and a world without feminine qualities will be a dead, soul less world.
Let me clarify, I am not big on feminism and feminist movements because they do a lot of harm to womankind than to improve their condition, though I would confess to being fascinated and charmed by women. I often wonder what makes a woman take all kinds of hits (physical /emotional / financial) from her loved ones and still continue to love them. How often have we heard of a woman suffering domestic violence quietly and in hope that her husband / boyfriend will mend ways if she continues to love him. Being a man, I would not shake hands with any person who was abusive of me; but a woman not only stays under the same roof with him but also feeds him and "makes love" to him. Either she is dead inside or she has a heart as large as ocean to forgive all his mistakes. I would like to believe its the latter.
There are innumerable instances of women forgiving their husband who have strayed and taken them back, I can't really remember the last time I heard a man to this. But all this is changing and changing quite swiftly. Women are abandoning their feminine qualities and taking up qualities unique to men. I have heard now than ever before "If he can do it, so can I". All this is leading to a world with no love, compassion and empathy there is only cut throat competition. So ladies, don't mould yourself into men; just take some of the good qualities that men have and blend it with your best ones. Similar advice goes out to the guys, "there is a woman in each one of you.. just let her free".
Imagine a all man's world; every one means business, there is no place for emotions and each one is fighting with other in gathering incremental benefits. In contrast a all woman's world will be the one with love, compassion and empathy along with your normal inborn qualities. We need a woman's world now more than ever. The next time you see an emotional scene in a play, feel free to cry; next time you meet your loved ones, tell them you love them and what they mean to you; next time you see someone in pain try to empathise with them. Its not a sign of weakness to show some emotions and if someone calls you a GIRL... feel proud about it.
So long....
PS: Excerpts and instances taken from "Vagina Monologues".
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Some prayers should not be answered..
My class teacher always said, "Be careful of what you pray for, because you do not know which of your prayers will be answered by God". I would go a little further with that, you never know in which form your prayer will be answered by God.
Raunak was a 6 year old kid who used to travel in my school-cab (auto). He was in pre-school; I being a 4th grader was always expected to walk him to his pre-school. To tell the fact, I hated this job. Even though it didn't cost me anything and his pre-school being just a small detour on my way to school, I hated dropping him off and picking him from his pre-school. I don't blame myself for being just a normal 4th grader hating any sort of responsibility, but what it ended up in, remains etched in my mind and many times makes me cry.
Raunak absolutely loved me. I was like the elder brother he never had, he used to keep chattering all the way from home to school and on the way back. He even kept mentioning about me to his parents and I was like "super hero" to him. I was not basking in the glory, for I knew this would only mean that I would become the designated person to accompany him to his pre-school. His parents even met me on couple of occasions thanking me for taking care of him like a younger brother. It was not long before I started hating Raunak. I was made to do a task I never wanted in first place and then made to look a "super hero" for that same task. Damn.. my luck. To make matters worse this little guy started imitating me, my style etc.. it felt like I was walking around with a miniature mirror image of myself. God, just take him away from me...
It was Christmas time and holiday season was about to begin. We had began preparing for the carols to be sung on Christmas and would have special prayer sessions every week. It was during this time that prospective students applied for admissions for the following year. Raunak coaxed his parents into applying for admissions at my school. He happily broke the news to me the follwing day.. saying.. "Bhaiyya (elder brother), now we will be in same school". Damn.... why are children so irritating. The following week, prayer sessions included a special prayer to the Lord from me; praying that "Raunak does not join my school.. There are many schools in the neighbourhood and all are great, so he wont be losing on anything by not joining my school but I would be gaining so much by him not joining."
Turns out.. he got the admission and his parents didn't even try for another school looking at his enthusiasm to join this school. I was shattered to say the least. I blamed God for letting me down; for not hearing my prayers. The rest of the school term was over and soon I forgot all about Raunak and was enjoying my holidays. As 01st of June (beginning of term) arrived, my heart sank. I had to bear my nemesis all the more; but I did not meet Raunak on first day of school or on the days to follow.. I was so glad that I didn't even bother finding out why he was missing.
One month down the line I heard from my Mom about Raunak, his parents visited my place to tell me about him. Not finding me at home, they had a chat with my Mom. On 31st May (day before the term began) Raunak had died. He had slipped and fallen into hot boiling water kept in container while there was a party at his house. His parents took the pain to locate my house to meet me and tell me this news as they knew I was the person closest to him. Apparently he was so happy all the vacation going gaga over the fact that he would be going to school with Bhaiyya (me). He spent 2 months of vacation buying books and stationary for school, his parents had never seen him so excited about anything before. Alas, he did not join my school. I cried like a baby that day.. even to this day his thought brings tears into my eyes.
Probably God answered my prayers, probably it was destined to happen. Whatever the reason be, I never forgave myself for hating Raunak. I never got an opportunity to apologise to him for having hated him all this while when all he did was loved me like a brother... and I never will. All he got for all his love for me was hate and he didn't deserve it. God loves us through various people and when we do not respect HIS love, he takes it away from us and leaves us to repent... all life..
We have to be thoughtful on what we pray for because we do not know in what way our prayer will be answered.
So long.....
Raunak was a 6 year old kid who used to travel in my school-cab (auto). He was in pre-school; I being a 4th grader was always expected to walk him to his pre-school. To tell the fact, I hated this job. Even though it didn't cost me anything and his pre-school being just a small detour on my way to school, I hated dropping him off and picking him from his pre-school. I don't blame myself for being just a normal 4th grader hating any sort of responsibility, but what it ended up in, remains etched in my mind and many times makes me cry.
Raunak absolutely loved me. I was like the elder brother he never had, he used to keep chattering all the way from home to school and on the way back. He even kept mentioning about me to his parents and I was like "super hero" to him. I was not basking in the glory, for I knew this would only mean that I would become the designated person to accompany him to his pre-school. His parents even met me on couple of occasions thanking me for taking care of him like a younger brother. It was not long before I started hating Raunak. I was made to do a task I never wanted in first place and then made to look a "super hero" for that same task. Damn.. my luck. To make matters worse this little guy started imitating me, my style etc.. it felt like I was walking around with a miniature mirror image of myself. God, just take him away from me...
It was Christmas time and holiday season was about to begin. We had began preparing for the carols to be sung on Christmas and would have special prayer sessions every week. It was during this time that prospective students applied for admissions for the following year. Raunak coaxed his parents into applying for admissions at my school. He happily broke the news to me the follwing day.. saying.. "Bhaiyya (elder brother), now we will be in same school". Damn.... why are children so irritating. The following week, prayer sessions included a special prayer to the Lord from me; praying that "Raunak does not join my school.. There are many schools in the neighbourhood and all are great, so he wont be losing on anything by not joining my school but I would be gaining so much by him not joining."
Turns out.. he got the admission and his parents didn't even try for another school looking at his enthusiasm to join this school. I was shattered to say the least. I blamed God for letting me down; for not hearing my prayers. The rest of the school term was over and soon I forgot all about Raunak and was enjoying my holidays. As 01st of June (beginning of term) arrived, my heart sank. I had to bear my nemesis all the more; but I did not meet Raunak on first day of school or on the days to follow.. I was so glad that I didn't even bother finding out why he was missing.
One month down the line I heard from my Mom about Raunak, his parents visited my place to tell me about him. Not finding me at home, they had a chat with my Mom. On 31st May (day before the term began) Raunak had died. He had slipped and fallen into hot boiling water kept in container while there was a party at his house. His parents took the pain to locate my house to meet me and tell me this news as they knew I was the person closest to him. Apparently he was so happy all the vacation going gaga over the fact that he would be going to school with Bhaiyya (me). He spent 2 months of vacation buying books and stationary for school, his parents had never seen him so excited about anything before. Alas, he did not join my school. I cried like a baby that day.. even to this day his thought brings tears into my eyes.
Probably God answered my prayers, probably it was destined to happen. Whatever the reason be, I never forgave myself for hating Raunak. I never got an opportunity to apologise to him for having hated him all this while when all he did was loved me like a brother... and I never will. All he got for all his love for me was hate and he didn't deserve it. God loves us through various people and when we do not respect HIS love, he takes it away from us and leaves us to repent... all life..
We have to be thoughtful on what we pray for because we do not know in what way our prayer will be answered.
So long.....
Thursday, November 5, 2009
To love or not to love..
To love or not to love is not in our hands.. its an instinct of sorts, because more often than not we do not choose the people we want to love, it sort of takes care of itself.
Abhi never thought Pam was the type of girl he would normally be attracted to. For starters, she worked in his office and he had heard a lot of her attitude being a problem for guys to approach. Somehow, with no prior planning, he asked her out on a date and she refused him bluntly. Known for his persistence, 3 weeks later he succeeded in taking her out for dinner and movie. Nothing dramatic happened on that date and after he dropped her off at her apartment that night he would not have imagined that one day he would be in love with this girl. Something that he never planned happened that night, something that was strange.
Pam was like the girl next door, chirpy, bubbly and full of playful antics. She could get away with most things making a cute innocent face that would disarm the opponent and she knew she had this power. There was no one who could point a finger at her and she was doted by one and all. Obviously, she, being the "hot-chick" of the team, was used to the "male attention" most of the time. One day this new guy in her office asks her out unexpectedly and not knowing how to respond, she refuses. Probably, she just wants to make sure that he actually wants to take her out and is not stumbling upon her. After 3 weeks of persistence she is out on a date with Abhi.
Abhi is like a man-with-a-plan. Mostly he does the right things when out on a date and more often than not ends up charming the girl all ends up. Either, Pam was hiding her feelings too nicely or he was horribly wrong that night, as he dropped her off that night, he didn't see the normal enthusiasm in her. It was like saying "Huh.. what the hell.. it was better than sitting at home". It didn't go well with him, not one bit. It confused him completely and he wanted to figure out how did he go wrong on this date.
Innumerable dates later, he still was unable to figure her out. She would be hot as fudge and cold as ice at the same time, this combination was killing Abhi and his quest for Pam became the only obsession for him. He would take her out on romantic dates, they would talk at great lengths about almost any topic in the world. They knew each others' family like their own despite not having met them. He would readily do anything for her and she for him. Despite all this, something was cosmetic, something just didn't feel right, something didn't make her feel that he truly loved her.
Pam was like the apple of her parents eye. She was doted ever since she was a child. There was never an instance that she was scolded by her father and rarely by her mother. She had, what you would call a fun filled childhood full of love and attention. Match that to the notoriety of her elder brother and it would not be rocket science to guess that most of her relatives loved her. She made wonderful friends all her life; friends who would absolutely do anything for her and would take care of her like a flower. She could be herself in their company with no one being judgmental and it was all pure unadulterated fun. Being the focus of guys' attention was not new to her either, she was kinda used to being in the spotlight all the time and being pursued all the time.
It finally dawned to Abhi what that strange feeling was, he had finally realized that no matter what he does for Pam, she would never notice it. A girl who has experienced so much love from everyone she met will never notice that he loves her. There is no scope for him to make a gesture to her that will be so unique, that it would make him special to her. It was almost like a fortress of family and friends which he will never be able to breach. That didn't break his confidence and he continued to love her with all he has, for he had realized that there was some thing special in this woman that endeared her to all and it was a privilege to have known and loved her.
God gives us all something special, this was her special gift and he had to live with it. Plus maybe she did love him and cared for him and maybe he was expecting a spectacular gesture... which didn't come along ... just because she didn't love him the way he did, doesn't mean she didn't love him with all she had.
Maybe this is true.... maybe not.. no one would ever know.
So long..
It finally dawned to Abhi what that strange feeling was, he had finally realized that no matter what he does for Pam, she would never notice it. A girl who has experienced so much love from everyone she met will never notice that he loves her. There is no scope for him to make a gesture to her that will be so unique, that it would make him special to her. It was almost like a fortress of family and friends which he will never be able to breach. That didn't break his confidence and he continued to love her with all he has, for he had realized that there was some thing special in this woman that endeared her to all and it was a privilege to have known and loved her.
God gives us all something special, this was her special gift and he had to live with it. Plus maybe she did love him and cared for him and maybe he was expecting a spectacular gesture... which didn't come along ... just because she didn't love him the way he did, doesn't mean she didn't love him with all she had.
Maybe this is true.... maybe not.. no one would ever know.
So long..
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Jinnah: the true divider of masses
Mohammed Ali Jinnah, the name brings just one picture into our minds "Partition of India". Pakistan respects its Quaid-e-Azam and calls him Baba-e-Quoam affectionately, for them he is what Mahatma Gandhi is to India. However, there is one major and true difference between the two great leaders. Gandhi's strength came from uniting people and Jinnah's from dividing people.
Jinnah was just another member of Indian National Congress and did not have any specific identity other than being a barrister and affluent class. That was not enough to highlight him in the Congress a there were scores of people who fitted in the same bracket and had better achievements to show. My guess is, he must have felt that by remaining with Congress, there was very small chance of reaching the pinnacle of Indian politics. So he founded the Muslim League, for the first time in 60 years of freedom struggle did the caste come into equation. People were fed with misgivings that India under the Congress leadership would not take care of its muslim population and treat them as second rate citizens. A fear so deep rooted that it remains alive even to this day.
Fear is the best method for gathering followers and using this Jinnah did gather many followers, he made people beileve that cast was an important criteria of who you are and your standing in the society. The divide started growing and the ultimate chasm was created in 1946 when he called for "Direct Action Day". Indians killed each other for creation of "Pakistan"; a concept so wierd that even 62 years later no one is sure what it actually was. Jinnah said Pakistan is the secular umberella under which all religions could co-exist unlike the Hindu India (aka Hindustan). Today the record states, Islamic republic of Pakistan and the Social republic of India. In short, its high time people realise that the concept of Pakistan was just a means for one individual to achieve his narrow goals in politics and every argument done to that effect fell flat on its face, today as we see it.
Jinnah divided country then and he divides it even now, there are no two opinions about it. Maybe, he realised it a bit too late in his life that what he had done would have reprecussion in the century ahead but that does not absolve him of the "sin of partition". Let us stop glorifying him even to this age because everytime you do so, he wins again... guys, he is still dividing us.. wake up..
So long....
Jinnah was just another member of Indian National Congress and did not have any specific identity other than being a barrister and affluent class. That was not enough to highlight him in the Congress a there were scores of people who fitted in the same bracket and had better achievements to show. My guess is, he must have felt that by remaining with Congress, there was very small chance of reaching the pinnacle of Indian politics. So he founded the Muslim League, for the first time in 60 years of freedom struggle did the caste come into equation. People were fed with misgivings that India under the Congress leadership would not take care of its muslim population and treat them as second rate citizens. A fear so deep rooted that it remains alive even to this day.
Fear is the best method for gathering followers and using this Jinnah did gather many followers, he made people beileve that cast was an important criteria of who you are and your standing in the society. The divide started growing and the ultimate chasm was created in 1946 when he called for "Direct Action Day". Indians killed each other for creation of "Pakistan"; a concept so wierd that even 62 years later no one is sure what it actually was. Jinnah said Pakistan is the secular umberella under which all religions could co-exist unlike the Hindu India (aka Hindustan). Today the record states, Islamic republic of Pakistan and the Social republic of India. In short, its high time people realise that the concept of Pakistan was just a means for one individual to achieve his narrow goals in politics and every argument done to that effect fell flat on its face, today as we see it.
Jinnah divided country then and he divides it even now, there are no two opinions about it. Maybe, he realised it a bit too late in his life that what he had done would have reprecussion in the century ahead but that does not absolve him of the "sin of partition". Let us stop glorifying him even to this age because everytime you do so, he wins again... guys, he is still dividing us.. wake up..
So long....
Why India should come up with more start ups.
Hey guys, I am back with another interesting topic to discuss on this forum. Before I begin here is a tid-bit, 1 in every 10000 ideas gets acceptance; 1 in every 1000 accepted ideas gets the funds and 1 in every 100 funded startups becomes a success i.e. the chance of your pet project becoming full fledged start-up (successful one at that) is 1 in a billion!! Now you know why people dont take chances..
Like any great idea, even a startup has no value ahead of its time; the interesting bit is, if we wait for the time to come, the idea is wortless. So its upto the individual to hardsell his idea well before its time has arrived, so that he can reap a rich harvest when the right time comes along. A startup needs investment and gestation, so any person planning for one, needs to think atleast 5 years ahead of time. Trust me, once you are invested, the thrill is un-imaginable.
At any point of time around $250 billion is available in California, USA to fund startups. They are just waiting for the right ideas to come along. Why is it that they have surplus cash stacked up and we in India dont; the answer is simple, we are averse to taking risk and trusting in another human being's intelligence. There are no startups funded by the US federal government so lets not blame the Government on this one!! the funds available are pooled in by a board of venture capitalists (VC s) who come from various walks of life and are willing to invest into ideas that may become a money spinner tommorrow. Is it then a surprise then that more than 60% of scientific and technological innovation happens in the US !
We as Indians, need to take more pride in the ability of the young minds of our country and start investing in them, if the top 10 CEOs of Indian firms contribute even 10% of their salaries / bonuses, we will have a pool of Rs. 48,00,00,000 /- ; imagine the amount of money we are generating in our country. We need to understand that if we want the youth of India to take pride and work for the betterment of our country, we need to give them something to work with. Indian-Americans are getting the highest number of patents registered for American firms as per recent data; imagine we have a huge pool of such people and we are are allowing other countries to tap into this resource rather than we do it ourselves.
I sincerely hope the big money spinners and people with surplus cash start investing some part of their money into such VC funds, because the returns that these will give you are far greater than what the capital markets can imagine of, plus we would be doing our bit for "BHARAT NIRMAN" and creating employment for many individuals. Therein lies a greater sense of satisfaction by making such investments.
So long...
Like any great idea, even a startup has no value ahead of its time; the interesting bit is, if we wait for the time to come, the idea is wortless. So its upto the individual to hardsell his idea well before its time has arrived, so that he can reap a rich harvest when the right time comes along. A startup needs investment and gestation, so any person planning for one, needs to think atleast 5 years ahead of time. Trust me, once you are invested, the thrill is un-imaginable.
At any point of time around $250 billion is available in California, USA to fund startups. They are just waiting for the right ideas to come along. Why is it that they have surplus cash stacked up and we in India dont; the answer is simple, we are averse to taking risk and trusting in another human being's intelligence. There are no startups funded by the US federal government so lets not blame the Government on this one!! the funds available are pooled in by a board of venture capitalists (VC s) who come from various walks of life and are willing to invest into ideas that may become a money spinner tommorrow. Is it then a surprise then that more than 60% of scientific and technological innovation happens in the US !
We as Indians, need to take more pride in the ability of the young minds of our country and start investing in them, if the top 10 CEOs of Indian firms contribute even 10% of their salaries / bonuses, we will have a pool of Rs. 48,00,00,000 /- ; imagine the amount of money we are generating in our country. We need to understand that if we want the youth of India to take pride and work for the betterment of our country, we need to give them something to work with. Indian-Americans are getting the highest number of patents registered for American firms as per recent data; imagine we have a huge pool of such people and we are are allowing other countries to tap into this resource rather than we do it ourselves.
I sincerely hope the big money spinners and people with surplus cash start investing some part of their money into such VC funds, because the returns that these will give you are far greater than what the capital markets can imagine of, plus we would be doing our bit for "BHARAT NIRMAN" and creating employment for many individuals. Therein lies a greater sense of satisfaction by making such investments.
So long...
Friday, July 17, 2009
There is no magic in this world..
Recently, I heard someone say, "nothing thats worth having in this world, comes easy". It took me a moment to understand what this actually means and then, all of a sudden, for no reason at all I mapped it to human relations. "We cannot choose our relatives, dats why God gave us friends", said a wise person and yet when it comes to mending relations we are always found wanting.
Human relations are based on likes and feels, so its no magic that you tend to be close to people whom you like and with whom you feel comfortable. This set-up has its side-effects too, it magically gives these very people the power to hurt you the most deeply. Like, Julius Ceaser got the most deepest stab wound from Brutus, we get the most scarring wounds from someone we hold dear. Yet, when the person comes back to you, you forgive and forget; setting up yourself to be hurt again. The funny part is, you never regret letting the person back into your life even if it means you will be hurt again and again.
When you find a person who cares for you, who makes an effort to keep you happy and holds you dear, always keep them close to you. There are very few people in this world who would love you for no reason, parents; siblings; beloveds and friends to name a few. So when you mess up with one them, make an effort to make-up because they are worth it. They are worth every cent you spend to mend bridges with them, for without them, your life will not be the same again.
This brings us to "how do we do it ". Well, there are many ways to mend a relationship and waiting for things to magically mend themselves is never one of them. Time heals worst of the wounds but not a broken relationship, so next time you are guilty of hurting someone who is dear to you, dont wait for things to mend themselves; get out and get working to mend the fences for there are no quick-fixes or magical solutions and because someone wise said, "nothing thats worth having in this world, comes easy".
So long....
Human relations are based on likes and feels, so its no magic that you tend to be close to people whom you like and with whom you feel comfortable. This set-up has its side-effects too, it magically gives these very people the power to hurt you the most deeply. Like, Julius Ceaser got the most deepest stab wound from Brutus, we get the most scarring wounds from someone we hold dear. Yet, when the person comes back to you, you forgive and forget; setting up yourself to be hurt again. The funny part is, you never regret letting the person back into your life even if it means you will be hurt again and again.
When you find a person who cares for you, who makes an effort to keep you happy and holds you dear, always keep them close to you. There are very few people in this world who would love you for no reason, parents; siblings; beloveds and friends to name a few. So when you mess up with one them, make an effort to make-up because they are worth it. They are worth every cent you spend to mend bridges with them, for without them, your life will not be the same again.
This brings us to "how do we do it ". Well, there are many ways to mend a relationship and waiting for things to magically mend themselves is never one of them. Time heals worst of the wounds but not a broken relationship, so next time you are guilty of hurting someone who is dear to you, dont wait for things to mend themselves; get out and get working to mend the fences for there are no quick-fixes or magical solutions and because someone wise said, "nothing thats worth having in this world, comes easy".
So long....
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Current Affairs.
Hello people, I am back and with a promise not to hibernate again.. I know you dont care, but it felt nice to say it :)
Sarcasm seems to be the order of the day, and I thought let me rub it in. You should forgive some comments that unintentionally hurt you.. Lets us begin with BJP's wonderful drubbing in the latest General Elections, I being not so much of a fan enjoyed this to the hilt. However I hope for sake of this country BJP comes to terms with this defeat and gets the message within; namely "Ram temple and communal violence has past its sell by date, further marketing this will dent the little goodwill thats remaining".
Moving on, rapes seemed to be in vogue lately or are reported more often.. wats wrong guys arent you getting some at your home that you are stooping to such a low level to satisfy your need. Come-on, for god sakes, if you are so desperate as a group, I guess you dont need one woman to vent your frustrations; you need to realise the "potential in you" to satisfy each other, after all the govenment is planning to do away with anti-gay law. You wont even get caught on the wrong side of the law ;) As for you, Shiney, you are an utter disgrace.. I know, you work for social equality, but equating your maid with an extra on-the-set (who wants to make it big in bollywood) is dumb. Now I hope the police make you realise how it feels to force things inside others..
Tamanna and Sakshi Pradhan have come out with their videos, oh godddd!!!! not again.. Guys, let me tell you and the risk of being repetative, by your antics on the sets of Splitsvilla-2 we guessed that you guys are a piece of shit.. Now you dont have to walk the extra mile to prove yourself all over again.. We do believe in your ability to land in shit of a situation always.. I hope Palak and rest read this before posing in any video.
Finally to the government, the last time I checked, we had right to life; right to freedom of expression and right to pursuit of happiness. So I guess there is no point in clenching your buttocks so hard when it comes to article 377. Lets be rational.. shall we !!
So long..........
Sarcasm seems to be the order of the day, and I thought let me rub it in. You should forgive some comments that unintentionally hurt you.. Lets us begin with BJP's wonderful drubbing in the latest General Elections, I being not so much of a fan enjoyed this to the hilt. However I hope for sake of this country BJP comes to terms with this defeat and gets the message within; namely "Ram temple and communal violence has past its sell by date, further marketing this will dent the little goodwill thats remaining".
Moving on, rapes seemed to be in vogue lately or are reported more often.. wats wrong guys arent you getting some at your home that you are stooping to such a low level to satisfy your need. Come-on, for god sakes, if you are so desperate as a group, I guess you dont need one woman to vent your frustrations; you need to realise the "potential in you" to satisfy each other, after all the govenment is planning to do away with anti-gay law. You wont even get caught on the wrong side of the law ;) As for you, Shiney, you are an utter disgrace.. I know, you work for social equality, but equating your maid with an extra on-the-set (who wants to make it big in bollywood) is dumb. Now I hope the police make you realise how it feels to force things inside others..
Tamanna and Sakshi Pradhan have come out with their videos, oh godddd!!!! not again.. Guys, let me tell you and the risk of being repetative, by your antics on the sets of Splitsvilla-2 we guessed that you guys are a piece of shit.. Now you dont have to walk the extra mile to prove yourself all over again.. We do believe in your ability to land in shit of a situation always.. I hope Palak and rest read this before posing in any video.
Finally to the government, the last time I checked, we had right to life; right to freedom of expression and right to pursuit of happiness. So I guess there is no point in clenching your buttocks so hard when it comes to article 377. Lets be rational.. shall we !!
So long..........
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Hara-kiri
Harakiri is a Japanese word which means a ritualistic suicide that the Samurai perform. I thought this might be an apt word to describe the turn of events in our very own Samurai's life.. that's right Mr. Lalit Kumar Modi. Its almost a shame if I do not dedicate a blog post to him after he pulled off a fast one on a billion people for 3 straight years.
Shashi Tharoor may have been caught in the whirlwind of things, but mostly everyone knew that game was being played elsewhere. He was a sacrificial lamb at the altar of our "holier than thou" politicians. It so played out that the very people who were gunning for Tharoor's scalp as the Minister are the ones found in bed with Lalit Modi and the sleaze money of IPL. Tharoor just paid the ultimate price for speaking up on a issue that most seasoned politicians would have not comment upon. He came out in the public declaring his mentor ship for Kochi team, his relationship to the beneficiary Ms. Pushkar and also the fact that he is not a share holder of the bid or in any form deriving any monetary benefits out of the exercises. He was dumped but not disgraced. I hope for his sake that the "hidden truth" behind failed bids of Adani and Dhoot are unravelled and we soon get official confirmation of the involvement of M/s Pawar and Son- in law(s) and M/s Patel and daughter(s) in the rigging of IPL bids.
Moving on to our Samurai in the picture; he has been the author of yet to be released book "How to lose friends and antagonise people". Long before he got the coveted post of IPL chairman he was known to burn bridges, pick up bones with powerful people; rub others on the wrong side, basically show arrogance. Somehow his personal charisma and contacts would get him out of soupy situations; contacts which he built not on basis of mutual friendship but mutual back-scratching. The disadvantage of such relationship being, you need to be in position of power perennially to scratch backs and the threat of being bumped off is always real. He used his proximity with Vasundhara Raje to win RCA elections, helped Pawar to win BCCI elections and became IPL godfather as a return favour. Then on he began his real business, involving making money for mainly one stake holder, namely Mr. Lalit Modi.
He had his finger in every pie and basically no matter what happened at IPL, he always made money out of it. Be it the bids for teams, bids for telecast rights, leaking insider information and I wouldn't be surprised if he also took cuts from players for placing them on the bid list. He did it all and did it in open. The strongest alibi for him being, he was IPL chairman and mostly the sole authority taking decisions. Such power normally gets into ones head easily and our protagonist wasn't any different; he pulled strings left, right and centre. The centre one bit him "u know where" as they have the power of institutions who can dig out the graves of done deals and flash a 1000W bulb on the dicey points.
What followed was IT / ED raids on basically everything Lalit Modi was involved with. The skeletons are still tumbling out and how. All I hope as a consumer of brand IPL is that this time let the buck not stop at him; let us see the makers of this monster who conveniently closed their eyes when he was out on looting spree. Let us see what Pawars and Patels did, what Narendra Modi did and basically what the Government did because we are bored of listening to the powers of Lalit Modi to hoodwink billions of people.
So long..
Shashi Tharoor may have been caught in the whirlwind of things, but mostly everyone knew that game was being played elsewhere. He was a sacrificial lamb at the altar of our "holier than thou" politicians. It so played out that the very people who were gunning for Tharoor's scalp as the Minister are the ones found in bed with Lalit Modi and the sleaze money of IPL. Tharoor just paid the ultimate price for speaking up on a issue that most seasoned politicians would have not comment upon. He came out in the public declaring his mentor ship for Kochi team, his relationship to the beneficiary Ms. Pushkar and also the fact that he is not a share holder of the bid or in any form deriving any monetary benefits out of the exercises. He was dumped but not disgraced. I hope for his sake that the "hidden truth" behind failed bids of Adani and Dhoot are unravelled and we soon get official confirmation of the involvement of M/s Pawar and Son- in law(s) and M/s Patel and daughter(s) in the rigging of IPL bids.
Moving on to our Samurai in the picture; he has been the author of yet to be released book "How to lose friends and antagonise people". Long before he got the coveted post of IPL chairman he was known to burn bridges, pick up bones with powerful people; rub others on the wrong side, basically show arrogance. Somehow his personal charisma and contacts would get him out of soupy situations; contacts which he built not on basis of mutual friendship but mutual back-scratching. The disadvantage of such relationship being, you need to be in position of power perennially to scratch backs and the threat of being bumped off is always real. He used his proximity with Vasundhara Raje to win RCA elections, helped Pawar to win BCCI elections and became IPL godfather as a return favour. Then on he began his real business, involving making money for mainly one stake holder, namely Mr. Lalit Modi.
He had his finger in every pie and basically no matter what happened at IPL, he always made money out of it. Be it the bids for teams, bids for telecast rights, leaking insider information and I wouldn't be surprised if he also took cuts from players for placing them on the bid list. He did it all and did it in open. The strongest alibi for him being, he was IPL chairman and mostly the sole authority taking decisions. Such power normally gets into ones head easily and our protagonist wasn't any different; he pulled strings left, right and centre. The centre one bit him "u know where" as they have the power of institutions who can dig out the graves of done deals and flash a 1000W bulb on the dicey points.
What followed was IT / ED raids on basically everything Lalit Modi was involved with. The skeletons are still tumbling out and how. All I hope as a consumer of brand IPL is that this time let the buck not stop at him; let us see the makers of this monster who conveniently closed their eyes when he was out on looting spree. Let us see what Pawars and Patels did, what Narendra Modi did and basically what the Government did because we are bored of listening to the powers of Lalit Modi to hoodwink billions of people.
So long..
Women's day 2009
It was yet another Women's day and nothing to celebrate about. Yes, we did hear commercials screaming out celebrate your woman-hood, but the sentiment hardly resonates when we look at reality. Even the women are done celebrating one day as womens day I guess, cos any woman I wished showed a luke warm response as if to suggest "Who cares a damn". So are we to say that women have become cynical or have they just resigned to fate. I hope for the happiness of the world this is not true.
Everywhere, you hear about crime against women whether it is harassment at work, domestic violence or say teenage crimes (date rapes etc.) and what you see often, is that the attitude seems to suggest, why make sucha a big deal about something thats so regular. Even the women have accepted it as a part of life and that is a dangerous thing. I am no bra-burning feminism theorist but it is my firm belief that the maker made no difference when he moulded women as compared to men.
We have reduced women to being a holy cow, in the name of reverence towards her and protecting her, we time and again inflict blows on her self-confidence. Such telling blows, that it dents the phyche and either makes her surrender to fate or stand up to the agressor and be called "woman of loose morals". In recent past we have seen many such "stray incidents" which cannot hide a pattern underneath all pointing towards one thing "women can never be seen as equal to men".
The next time we see a woman being attacked, (in broad daylight or ortherwise) lets take a moment to think, how would you like if your sister/wife/fiancee/girlfriend/friend was attacked and there was no one to stop it. Imagine that helpless situation, and if you dont want to be in that situation, then take up the cause of any woman you see in trouble cos u never know today's incident thats left unchecked may return and harm someone close to you and maybe in larger proportions.
This women's day lets take an oath that "Even if I cannot improve the status of women in this world, atleast I will not play a role in degrading it" cos if a woman can bring you to this world, there is hardly anything that she can't do :)
So long...
Everywhere, you hear about crime against women whether it is harassment at work, domestic violence or say teenage crimes (date rapes etc.) and what you see often, is that the attitude seems to suggest, why make sucha a big deal about something thats so regular. Even the women have accepted it as a part of life and that is a dangerous thing. I am no bra-burning feminism theorist but it is my firm belief that the maker made no difference when he moulded women as compared to men.
We have reduced women to being a holy cow, in the name of reverence towards her and protecting her, we time and again inflict blows on her self-confidence. Such telling blows, that it dents the phyche and either makes her surrender to fate or stand up to the agressor and be called "woman of loose morals". In recent past we have seen many such "stray incidents" which cannot hide a pattern underneath all pointing towards one thing "women can never be seen as equal to men".
The next time we see a woman being attacked, (in broad daylight or ortherwise) lets take a moment to think, how would you like if your sister/wife/fiancee/girlfriend/friend was attacked and there was no one to stop it. Imagine that helpless situation, and if you dont want to be in that situation, then take up the cause of any woman you see in trouble cos u never know today's incident thats left unchecked may return and harm someone close to you and maybe in larger proportions.
This women's day lets take an oath that "Even if I cannot improve the status of women in this world, atleast I will not play a role in degrading it" cos if a woman can bring you to this world, there is hardly anything that she can't do :)
So long...
Sunday, February 15, 2009
In the name of Law..
Long ago, at school I heard a proverb, "Law is an ass, it kicks both ways". It didn't make sense to me then, but now its clear more than ever.
Law needs evidence and come to think of it, damning evidence can be falsified in the court of law and the orchestrator of this mockery becomes the most sought after "lawyer". I have nothing against the profession, but I have a few things against its practitioners. They shake our confidence in the rule of law, instead of instilling confidence in the masses.
Latest example of the level of stupidity of their arguments was when Ajmal Kasab trial was to go to court, no lawyer was ready to represent him. To an extent was the bar council chief was on television making a mockery of the profession by advocating that no self respecting Indian will take up the cause of a Pakistani terrorist and people like him must be hanged in public without a trial. This coming from a lawyer is funny enough and add to that the absurd arguments to prove the point, I pity the judge who hears such things regularly.
Lawyers have in the past always sought to represent the high profile defendants in the court whether its a Abu Salem, Muthappa Rai or in case of Nitish Katara or Jessica Lall murder. They have converted the so- called airtight cases into questionable cases and got the benefit of doubt for their clients. When a lawyer fabricated evidence in BMW case, people sought to get him barred from practice, but imagine the low profile cases where fabrication of evidence is a norm. These cases will never see face of light cos no NDTV is interested in low profile cases.
The point I am making is that a bunch of traders have converted a profession to a sham, so far, that people don't want to set a foot in the court room as they will be milked dry of their money and yet the justice they expect will not be delivered. It is my humble request to a few high profile lawyers, if you could use your expertise to represent the prosecutor and get early convictions, maybe another Ajmal Kasab will think twice before setting a foot on our lands. Lets make sure these people don't act with immunity to justice.
So long...
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