Pyaar impossible.. its possible hain na ??

Recently I heard a puzzling statement from someone, " love does not mean ending up married to each other, there is a more profound meaning to it and it goes much beyond proximity". I wondered why would anyone fall in love with another human being and not want to end up together. She told me a story to prove her point and I hope I narrate the story to the desired effect as it was meant by her. As a precursor, I am posting this out of my memory and if I end up not depicting this rightly I apologise to the protagonists, I meant to highlight the point stated above using your story.



Sam (Sameer) was like the guy next door, he was quiet in his mannerism and a very upright character. He was like this shy character that you donut tend to pick out among more flamboyant creatures who tread the college turf. There was no air of superiority about him or was there any high handedness in his behaviour. He was simple unassuming college guy who had a look of responsible and mature man and not typical college boy charms. Vibha was the college sweetheart, she had the oomph and she was very aware of it. In short she was the type of gal you cant help but notice on a college campus. Ever lively and full of life. This story is about them, how they met, fell in love and lived happily ever after.



Sam was never bitten by the love bug, ever in his life and had not known what it was to love another person or be loved by another person. All his notions about this emotion was from the movies and he never thought that beyond all the glamour there was such a thing called LOVE. Vibha was very familiar with this emotion as she had seen from her teenage years guys pursuing and declaring their love for her. Feeling the emotion of being loved and wanted was pretty routine and needles to say she had a few attempts at relationships.



Any hu, moving on... for the first time in his life, Sam felt a strange tug in his heart towards this chic named Vibha from the same group. A tug he couldn't explain and couldn't describe as he didn't have anything to compare it to. All he knew was, that she meant a lot to him and given a choice he would choose her happiness over his. He always remembered the day they were introduced by a common friend and was always grateful to that person for getting him introduced to such an amazing girl. Sam and Vibha's friendship clicked and they spent a lot of time together and at times when they were not together, they were hooked on to the phone chatting with each other. In short the beginning of romance was pretty much on expected lines, however, the romance for Sam was mere affection for Vibha. It was yet another affectionate friend to her as this was familiar territory; Sam was hugely smitten and this novel rush of blood was exciting and he yearned her company more and more.



Finally the day arrived when he said, he confessed his true feelings for her and she behaved much on expected lines like any female would do. Basically telling him, try harder dude, I am not feeling the emotions yet !! Internally, she knew he was more than a friend, but she wanted the feeling to get stronger by denying it to herself. Finally the day arrived when she agreed to be in a committed relationship with him. Sam was overjoyed. He could finally see the writing on the wall; MBA degree; a well paid job; Vibha as his partner ;life time of happiness. That's the power of first love, you tend to build too many castles in first few days and always assume relationship is all about the good times.



Life taught him the hardships of maintaining a relationship pretty soon. The major fault or double fault a guy commits is wishing away the girl's past life; that includes all her friends, her ex boyfriends basically the entirety of her life without him. This hits hard in first few days and the smart ones try to get involved and create a rapport with the girls' life outside his bubble and the dumb ones try to fight away. Sam was different, even though he knew he was on par with her pals, he never complained; he kept showering her with presents et al. trying to make her feel special all the time. Vibha, who was so used to being "apple of the eye"; couldn't see his special efforts as he meant them and it many times he ended up irritating her by coming off as a guy who marks his territory. The heartache and tiffs continued. It was simple issue of the girl not letting her new relationship come in the way of her friends and the guy wanting to be around her all the time. Both were right in their respective places, all they needed was a perspective about the other.





Sam was heartbroken many times and Vibha let him bleed, and when Vibha felt suffocated, Sam didn't back off; but even after the offs and ons the relationship grew stronger as the days passed and the day arrived when the topic of commitment was discussed. Sam was pretty sure about Vibha and so was she about him and both wanted to be married to each other. Sam not being good with words, was not able to explain to Vibha about his family and their expectations about the couple and the message that went across to her was that, this relationship can be built only at the cost of compromising a lifestyle, a career and everything she loved about life. Vibha was not ready to let go of entire identity just for the sake of of this relationship and Sam was not able to instill that confidence in her that all things could be worked out. After a harrowing experience of friction, the couple decided to part ways amicably. Their friends tried to make them understand that they were doing a mistake and they should in fact be together, but somehow no one saw reason and the relationship ended. It just wasn't meant to be.




College was over and friends drifted apart and went on their separate journeys of life. Sam and Vibha stayed in touch but was just superficial. Vibha met this guy at work and started dating him and soon forgot all about past and moved on. A year on, Vibha received a call from Sam. He was getting engaged to be married soon to this girl of parents choice and he wanted to meet Vibha and talk to her. They met; they talked and soon it was evident to them that their love for each other had not died, they had assumed that living apart and being involved with other people would give them the necessary closure, but it didn't. Vibha felt a strange sense of loss that Sam would be married to another person and that was kinda last nail in the coffin and there was no hope. They talked and talked of how they could have acted better and saved a wonderful relationship but how it was too late for them and nothing could be done.





That day, before they left, they decided that they will keep that special place in their heart for each other, maintain contact provided their spouses do not mind and nurture this as a friendship that could have been so much more. Vibha never forgave Sam for not trying hard enough to convince her and Sam always thought Vibha could have been a little more mature. But in the end it was all about "would have beens" and that's what brought an unnatural end to this beautiful relationship. Some wise person recently told me, 9 out of 10 relationships don't work out or end in a divorce. The one that sticks is because there is one person in the relationship who is fighting hard to keep the relationship alive. There are no perfect relationships and most relationships grind you down. The trick lies in wanting to be there and fight it even when things suck....



So long....